Wednesday, November 24, 2010

The Great 'murican Holiday

"I am not a good American...I prefer to form my own opinions" - George Carlin

I trust that most of you are off tomorrow to celebrate with your families, or whomever, that most American holiday, Thanksgiving.

OK, one might say, 4th of July is pretty damned American too, but here's the real difference, and the reason I give Turkey Day the red, white and blue thumbs up.



This day is about the most 'murican of 'murican activities...killing and eating. What could be more 'murican than that? The Four of July? Well, lots of loud, pseudo-killing with fireworks, but no ACTUAL slaughter. Certainly lots of imbibing of Daddy-type beverages, giving one the excuse to "asshole out", but no ritual stuffing of the gut with stuffing and copious amounts of starch and sugar.

No sir, Thanksgiving is THE holiday. Thank you Jesus!

Of course there are some who would give this day a definite, 5 Star...Thumbs Down. For example:



What I have to say to that is...tough shit, Tom. Life's a bitch...unless of course, one is a Repukelican spokes-piece.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm, speaking of turkeys...18 minutes per pound...Glenn Beck...225 lbs @ 375 degrees = Never mind...mostly flab anyway.

HAVE A HAPPY ONE EVERYBODY.

31 comments:

RealityZone said...

And a Happy Gobble Gobble to you and yours also.
Speaking of Tom.
Did Tom De Lay get basted yet?

jadedj said...

RZ---And to you my friend. Hope things improve in your sphere. As to De Lay...pasted maybe. Looks like a major drunk to me.

RealityZone said...

http://realityzone-realityzone.blogspot.com/2010/11/hammer-comes-down-delay-convicted-john.html

5 years to life. LOL
Hope he takes his knee pads with him.
He will need them.
They love little rich boys for toys. LOL

Doug said...

Happy Thanksgiving, JJ.

I had a Glenn Beck comment, but nah, he's all yours ;-)

Jerry Critter said...

LOL. Beck -- "mostly flab"...and full of shit!

jadedj said...

RZ---Don't pick up the soap, boy!

Doug---No, no, no...have at it. The more the merrier.

Jerry---HAR HAR HAR! Damn, I wish I had thought of that..."mostly flab, and stuffed with shit". GOOD ONE!

Chimp said...

Glad I already ate my turkey, otherwise I would think about shitty Glenn and ...! However, once the real depression hits, we'll have to eat the rich like Glenn, Sarah, Big Sis and Rush.

But before things get more "depressing" turkey will do. Just don't touch Tom's junk.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING JJ & & FAMILY & FOLLOWERS!!!

jadedj said...

Chimp---Even cannibals wouldn't eat that sorry ass bunch!

You too Chimp, my good on-line friend of 4 to 5 years now.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Wishing a Happy Beck-free Thanksgiving to you!

The Plashing Vole said...

Happy Thanksgiving my American friends. I think you'll all enjoy reading this:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/cifamerica/2010/nov/23/congress-us-politics

jadedj said...

DSWS---What more could one wish for! Ditto to you.

Plashing---Thank you for the good wishes. Also thanks for the link...very interesting, and infuriating article. We are living in a lopsided society here, which comes as no surprise to thinking Americans.

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

I bet American Indians don't celebrate Thanksgiving.

jadedj said...

YD G---Nor yell about getting their cuntree back, although they would have a more valid case for that.

Mr. Charleston said...

Actually, I'll have to part company with you on this one JJ. I believe Thanksgiving is our best holiday. No guns, no flags, political season over. Just good folks, good food and football. Nothing wrong with that.

jadedj said...

Mr. C---You need to get your sense of humor back C. Did I say there was any thing wrong with the holiday? The piece was tongue-in-cheek.

Kulkuri said...

I kinda agree with Mr. C. No fireworks to simulate "the rockets red glare and bombs bursting in mid-air", nobody shooting guns just to make noise. Good food, maybe, but the football, not so much when you have teams like the Lions and Cowpukes playing, where you wonder how are they going to lose this one???

As for the Beckster, once you trim off the fat and clean out the shit, there wouldn't be much left, a few hours cooking time at the most!!

jadedj said...

Kulkuri---Beckster...not to mention the loss of liquid due to tears. Way too dry.

PENolan said...

If I get started, I'll sound like Hitler with all the people I'd be shoving in the oven. So I'll put it this way: If Glenn Beck is Hanzel, who is Gretel?

Nibble Nibble like a mouse, whose that nibbling at my house?

Punch said...

gobble, gobble,

jadedj said...

Trish---Gretel would be more than one, wouldn't she.

Punch---I believe the term is, gobbled gobble. Just sayin'.

Chimp said...

Happy "Black & Blue" Friday!!! If you don't come out of the store black and blue, it wasn't worth it!

Tom Harper said...

What Reality Zone said. Tom DeLay's shitty Thanksgiving means a happy Thanksgiving for the rest of us.

I'd try to write more, but I'm too stuffed and bloated to think.

jadedj said...

Chimp---Better yet, stay the fluck out of them entirely.

Tom---Same problem with my response. I feel, bloopy...bloop, bloop, even a day later.

Harlequin said...

my spouse is american and is now a dual citizen, so we are going to cook and devour a suitably large fowl to celebrate all we have to be thankful for.... which, even in my most cynical moments i have to admit, is lots.

have a good one, too!!

jadedj said...

Harlequin---Thank you!

Chimp said...

Big Sis will be visiting you, Harlequin. Only Israelis are allowed dual citizenship in the US.

HAPPY BLACK SUNDAY!

intelliwench said...

I waited to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving in hopes that it would mean I'd still have 3 days off ahead of me. Somehow I don't think that's going to work, though...

jadedj said...

intell---It's the Theory of Relativity kicking ass. My wife had 4 days off, and is wondering what "hoppened" as well. I hope, despite the fact that intellikid didn't make it for the bird day (am I remembering that correctly?), that the days away from the grind helped at least a little :-)

LORD TRUTH 101 said...

Hah! This ought to piss of righty. My brother in law, THE ARAB, always cooks the turkey in his turkey fryer for the family.

I always ask him the same thing about what kind of Arab spices he uses in the stuffing. He says Cajun and garlic and he didn't know they were Arabian.


The guys a riot. Lousy golfer. But still a riot.

LORD TRUTH 101 said...

Damn this comment moderation!

jadedj said...

Lord Truth---Sorry about the moderation. I get harassed now and then by a religious nut who is a little on the unstable side. I turn on the moderation for a while, and he gives up after a week or two. It's a stupid game we play.