Sunday, December 12, 2010

Cinema Bella

"I am not a good American...I prefer to form my own opinions" - George Carlin

"It's difficult to remember one came to drain the swamp when one is up to one's ass in alligators" - Barack Obama (not really his quote...but it should have been)

My brother was an Eagle Scout as a young lad. He has long since come to the conclusion that the Boy Scouts are a quasi-military organization, much along the lines of the Hitler Youth, but sans goose stepping. My brother was adamant as his son grew up that the kid never go anywhere near a BS meeting. Of course, when he and the boy's mother got a divorce, there wasn't much my brother could do to keep her from converting to Catholicism,...thereby exposing the kid to Catholic priests (those are not my words...those are my brother's words...exposing, I mean).

I can't really speak to the Boy Scout conclusion with any authority, since I never got beyond the Tenderfoot rating. It wasn't a like of smarts, per se, but a lack of drive...and the love of comic books...and...girls. That is, as opposed to Boy Scout Manuals...and commiserating with other boys on Tuesday nights.

Anyway, true to his Eagle Scout instincts and training, he still to this day, operates under the Boy Scout and U.S. Army OCS code...the code being the "Five Ps". I have not a clue as to how many times I, for one, have had to repeat this damned thing to an OCS Tact Officer back in my John Wayne days, when I was being trained to be a leader of men, and cannon fodder. Basically, the Five Ps are...Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance. Usually it had to be repeated whilst doing 50 push ups after having performed...well...poorly...and, it had to be uttered rapidly. If you couldn't coordinate the tongue with the push ups and became tongue-tied...it cost you 50 more.
Try it...fast. PPPPP, over and over and over. Get my point?

When I related this to my brother way back there in the rewind of my mind, he knew exactly what I was talking about. HIS 5P trauma however, wasn't accented with push ups.

In case you are wondering..."what the fuck is this dude, JJ rambling about?"...let me get to the point. My brother never puts off anything, ever. He's a get 'er done kind of guy...all because of that damned 5P code thingy. Consequently he tends to do things a tad early...such as, be at the airport 3 hours early...show up for get-togethers an hour early...or send Xmas presents a month early...the latter being the subject of this post. At last, eh?

We got our presents from him the first of last week (oh, yeah, he also insists that we open them immediately...which we did). Mine turned out to be something I would never buy for myself, being the cheap ass Scotch/Irish consumer that I am. It was a...Flip Camcorder. He picked up on the fact that our camcorder is of the 90s and depends on tape, as opposed to disks or internal memory. A dinosaur of electronics.

So, here is my first video...which I downloaded to YouTube, after fussing with it in Windows Movie Maker...a very nice little program!

Have a stiff drink...or something decaffeinated...or one of those Cannabis laced smokes, and take a look...HEY IT'S ONLY A FERKING MINUTE or so long...JEEZ.

BTW-the music is by the Aisha Duo and it's called, "Despertar". I sincerly hope they don't sue me...or the Cafe Arabica people for that matter.

I have to go take a meeting now. Ciao.

Frederico



In case you are wondering...what you are viewing there is the Operation Central of the Banquet of Consequences.

25 comments:

intelliwench said...

There really isn't much to do there in Nebraska, is there?

jadedj said...

intell---Signorina, you hurta mea to the quicka. Dove è il bagno?

Doug said...

"That was swell", Doug said, tongue planted firmly in his cheek. "Now get outside with that toy and fetch us some real video."

jadedj said...

Doug---Signore, are you suggesting that I should withdraw my name from the Academy nominations? Ci porti il conto?

RealityZone said...

Keep your day gig. :-)

Punch said...

That is a break through. Lets see more.

Doug said...

Ja, si, da, oui.
Fino anno prossimo, signore.

intelliwench said...

Milli scusi, maestro! I overlooked the symbolism of the stapler turned away from the camera. hehehe...very clever, that.

jadedj said...

RA...a no, waita...I meana, RZa---I now knowa Oliver Stone's apain a. Vilified bya hisa owna countrymena. Ho mal di testa.

Punch---At lasta, a signore of fino quality, and tasta.

Doug----I ama ata lossa..."Below are the results of your search for: Fino anno prossimo
0 matches found. Documents 0 - 0 displayed."

intell---Buta, isa the stapler loaded..or unloaded? Eh?

Debra She Who Seeks said...

I laughed, I cried, it became part of me. Bravo!

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

brava....er...author...er...oscar...er..nice

Punch said...

Le alabó el traje nuevo

jadedj said...

DSWS---A chi ora chiude?

YD G---er, thanka you a.

Punch---Easy for you to say, pal.

Chimp said...

Fantastico!!! Bravo!!! Encore!!!! Sorry, I just finished looking at a SOUTH PARK video. Now, to your video.

Chimp said...

Fifty years later, I can remewmber "Be Prepared" and the Scout Oath. Thirty five years later, I can still remember my US Army number - the one they gave in the old days before they switched to Social Security numbers. I also remember riding a steam train in Germany when I was 4. I have no idea what this has to do with your story and video...

Mr. Charleston said...

Geeeez! Yeah, it's only a minute once you finally get there. Besides, you left out the sixth and most important "P". Prior Planning Prevents Piss-Poor Performance.

Chimp said...

Previous Prior Prudent Planning Prevents Piss-Poor Prefarable Project Performance

jadedj said...

Chimp---This is loosely based on South Park...I can see how you would get confused. Arivadirty.

Chimp---You need to let it go fella. Cianti!

Mr. C---Picky, picky, picky, picky, picky. Yours would be 6 Ps would it not? Anyway, I believe what you meant to say was, Prior Planning Prevents Punch's Piss-Poor Performance. Non parlo l'italiano!

Chimp---Can't beat that old army training, eh? Dov'è l'ufficio informazioni turistiche?

Punch said...

Proactive Punch
prefers prior planning
preventing poor penis penetration
providing practically perfect performance.

tnlib said...

Errrr.

jadedj said...

tnlib---Capisco, Signorina...o no.

Mr. Charleston said...

Oh Lord! I must have come to the wrong place. Nevermind.

Harlequin said...

wow-- bilingual.
the film was deep and meaningful, filled with intriguing metaphor and evoking a myriad of emotional responses.
you are brilliant.
there, now don't you feel better??

looking forward to more productions... prepared,planned, pleasantly perky perfectly preposterous

PENolan said...

So, was this video planned?

Actually, I liked having this glimpse into your environment. Like a postcard from the edge . . .

jadedj said...

Charleston and Harlequin, I am so sorry...for whatever reason, sometimes I am not alerted in my email about comments on my blog. I truly wasn't ignoring you. Tricia did come through, go figure.

Mr. C---Sorry, no XXX in this theater, pal. Belle parole non pascon i gatti.

Harlequin---Grazie Bella! You tooka de word right outa my moutha. Si, bilingual with the help of il Google.

Tricia---Si signorina. Vorrei cambiare dei soldi.