Saturday, November 20, 2010

JJ...The Idea Thief

"I am not a good American...I prefer to form my own opinions" - George Carlin

I admit it, I stole this from Chimp at Planet of the Chimps. It was too tempting to pass up, and anyway, I had to do it just in case my readers didn't see it over there. The subject...TSA Bumper Stickers.

My favorite, WE HANDLE MORE PACKAGES THAN THE USPO.

Thanks Chimp.

28 comments:

Chimp said...

You are so welcome, JJ. Send CASH or Green Stamps To Chimp, P.O. Box 911 WTC, NY, NY 10001

Chimp said...

My favorite, "No, I'm not happy to see you, TSA Screener. That's my banana!"

Doug said...

I'm glad I hate to fly and therefore don't.

jadedj said...

Chimp---Confederate dollars OK?

Chimp---Hey, do you know the one about the nuns in the pickle patch?

Doug---Just don't take your junk with you.

KIT said...

Thanks for sharing that. I needed a laugh, and this did the trick. :)

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Hahahaha -- Lady Gaga and Freedom Pat are my faves!

yellowdoggranny said...

I'm thinking of taking a round the world trip just so I can get frisked...only way I'm going to get any action.

jadedj said...

KIT---Wow, long time no see. I hope things are going your way :-). Glad you got a chuckle out of it.

DSWS---Me too. Not on the list...TSA-We KNOW you have junk in your trunk.

YD G---Why do I NOT believe that? The action part that is?

Chimp said...

Nun goes through the TSA scanner. Screener spots something unusual mandating pat-down. "What's this pickle doping here, sister?" says screener. "We had picled for dinner and I saved one for Mother Superior." replied the nun

intelliwench said...

The friendly skies just got a whole lot friendlier, eh?

jadedj said...

Chimp---*groan*

intell---It is touching, isn't it?

Leslie Parsley said...

If I were a TSA agent, I think I'd look for another job before doing this. What happens if a guy gets a hard on? Will they think it's a weapon?

It'll be a cold day in hell before I fly anywhere now.

Chimp said...

You mean like, "Is that a gun sir, or are you just glad I'm patting you down?"

Sunny said...

I see Chimp has been "cyber busy" this morning...haha.

Here's MY saying : "You toucha my stuff, I'll breaka your face!"

I was the first one to call you "JJ. " Smiles. I think it fits pretty darn well for a nickname, yes ? :)

Stay safe and warm out there , you and your family! Hugs, Sunny

Sunny said...

PS : I'm singing on cam in my latest post...a video of I'll Be Home For Christmas.....it was done in July for Christmas In July challenge!
Hope you enjoy! Thanks !

Chimp said...

I was at the mall yesterday, and it was definitely Christmas. Even "Photography" Santa was there. So, your song is just in time, Sunny.

But, let's enjoy the Thanksgiving turkey first.

The turkey told the Pilgrim: "You can chop-off my neck, but don't touch my junk!"

jadedj said...

Sunny---Thanks kid. I didn't realize that was you...but I prefer it to Jadedj :)

Sunny---I'll get over there and check it out.

Chimp---I think we need to find out what's under all those feathers. Could be a terrorist turkey from Turkey.

jadedj said...

tnlib---oops, my infamous skip a comment at work...sorry, didn't mean to.

I think the reaction depends on the caliber of the weapon. You know, there are small caliber weapons, and there are humongous John Holmes caliber weapons. Just guessing.

Chimp said...

Something to think about when you read this headline:

ABC producer says TSA agent felt inside her underwear


QUESTION: DOES A TSA SCREENER CHANGE HIS OR HER GLOVES AFTER TOUCHIUNG SOMEONE'S SEXUAL ORGANS AND BEFORE TOUCHING THE NEXT VICTIM? ARE THEY SPREADING STD & HIV/AIDS DISEASES? ARE THEY INFECTING THE TRAVELING PUBLIC AND OUR CHILDREN?

jadedj said...

Chimp---Hmmmmm. Is that scientifically possible?

Chimp said...

Well, if he/she does a cavity search at the same time and fluids remain on the gloves. He/She can definitely pass on crabs, fungus, colds and other skin diseases.

Chimp said...

One TSA employee ruined it for all. He decided to take work home. He raped her and then he tried to kill himself. Now, the TSA people are not allowed to take work home anymore. What bummer.

http://chimpplanet.blogspot.com/2010/11/tsa-worker-allegedly-abducts-assaults.html

Sunny said...

For everyone's information ~ Chimp has been invited to celebrate "thanks - giving" with me this evening. He has to work tomorrow, Thanksgiving day.......I have real turkey and pumpkin pie and ice cream and the other stuff.

HAVE A WONDERFUL THANKSGIVING JJ AND YOUR FAMILY TOO. Hugs, Sunny

jadedj said...

Chimp---That would be the "If we touch, don't ask" policy?

Sunny---My condolences...try to have a good bird day anyway ;-) Just kidding, kid.

Sunny said...

Thanks, JJ ! Chimp filled his tummy full and I'll bring him left-overs when he gets home from work tomorrow evening.

Meanwhile I will be "home alone" but not really,lol. 225 apartments in my building!

I'm going to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade and football! Also spending some time in SingSnap!

jadedj said...

Sunny---We will be watching in a different time zone, as well. My youngest looks forward to the parade more than the Tom.

Jaliya said...

Ya can't say "Nope!"
to our right to grope!

... These are hilarious ... Thank you ...

jadedj said...

Jaliya---I don't know why your comment took so long to get through the system, but it just came through to me. Sorry.

That's a good one. How about, We grope your rope instead of dope.